How to Cook a Zebra

My wife and I are wandering around San Antonio, Texas visiting various sites and enjoying the warmer-than-New England weather.

We decided to take a ride to Fredericksburg to explore one of the numerous caverns in the Texas Hill country. On the way back, we passed one of the many large ranches that dot the area.

We spotted a herd of zebra grazing along the fence. We got excited by the prospect of a new experience.

Always on the lookout for things to do, we decided to research this “refuge” and add it to our sites to visit.

Such naiveté.

This is Texas. This was not a refuge, it was a guided exotic hunting ranch. One can plop down a large sum of money and SHOOT the zebras, or water buffalo, or gazelle, or pretty much any non-native exotic animal one can name.

As far I as I can tell, there is no human hunting ranch. But from the looks of society, it may be available soon.

I am not a hunter but I have a number of friends who are. They enjoy journeying into the woods to hunt Bambi and other native creatures. I do not have any desire to do this, but I also do not condemn those that do. The hunters I know use all of the meat from the creatures they kill. There is some sense of fairness in that.

But zebras?

The idea of importing animals for the sole purpose of killing them seems, well, barbaric. Yet, I wondered, is there a recipe for zebra? I turned to the all-knowing Google.

Turns out there is.

http://www.danslowbutchers.co.uk/recipes.htm

Exotic Meat Recipes found online.

  1. Cooking Kangaroo
  2. Cooking Ostrich
  3. Cooking Camel
  4. Cooking Zebra
  5. Cooking Wild Boar
  6. Cooking Wildebeest
  7. Cooking Buffalo/Bison
  8. Cooking Lion
  9. Cooking Crocodile
  10. Cooking Reindeer

Who knew?

In the brief time we drove by the zebras, they just stood there munching away on the grass. Doesn’t seem like much of a challenge to me. Hunting a zebra is as challenging as shooting a horse.

I also checked with Google on the risk of death from zebras. I didn’t find specific numbers of human fatalities but one has to assume there are at least a few. One thing was certain, there has never been one recorded Death by Zebra in Texas.

Ever.

Zebras have been known to kill lions. They do it because they do not wish to be eaten by the lion, not for the fun of lion killing.

In the wild, zebras run away from humans. Wise choice.

They have resisted efforts to be domesticated. Who can blame them?

The fact that some of us would pose proudly over a recently killed zebra says a lot about how far humanity is from deserving the title Homo Sapiens.

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About Joe Broadmeadow

Joe Broadmeadow retired with the rank of Captain from the East Providence Police Department after serving for 20 years. He is the author of the novels Collision Course, Silenced Justice, and Saving the Last Dragon available on Amazon in print and Kindle. Joe is working o the latest in a series of Josh Williams and Harrison "Hawk" Bennett novels and a sequel to Saving the Last Dragon. In 2014 Joe completed a 2,185 mile thru-hike of the Appalachian Trail
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